After weeks of battling spreadsheets that seemed determined to gaslight us and a computer that has started making noises that definitely weren’t in the manual, we can finally announce that the firework orders for this year are officially done. Finished. Completed. Banished. The kind of done where you close the laptop with the dramatic flair of someone who’s earned the right to never look at another product code again.

The new range is enormous, almost suspiciously enormous, to the point where we briefly wondered if we’d accidentally ordered enough fireworks to stage our own Olympic opening ceremony. We’ve also brought in a couple of new suppliers who seem genuinely enthusiastic, which is refreshing because at one point we were so deep into the process that we’d have happily accepted stock from a man on a bicycle if he promised to send his paperwork on time.

The videos are mostly finished too, which means we’ve spent far too many hours watching explosions in slow motion and convincing ourselves that this is a perfectly normal way to spend a workday. The website has been updated so thoroughly it’s practically glowing, although it did put up a fight, as if it sensed we were on a deadline and decided to test our emotional resilience. And of course, because this is fireworks, we’re still waiting on a few last‑minute scraps of information from suppliers who apparently operate on a timezone that exists outside the known universe.

But despite all that, we’re calling it done. We’re stepping away. We’re blinking at natural light like confused Victorian children. And for at least a brief moment, we’re going to enjoy the rare and beautiful feeling of not having to think about order forms, delivery schedules, or whether a cake labelled “Thunderous Nebula Vortex” should be categorised under 1.3G or 1.4G.